SharonYo's Xanga

HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO MY #1 DAD! 52 AND COUNTING!

Fri, 16 Oct 2009 16:49:13 GMT

I dont think I've ever dedicated a WHOLE post to my dad. Shame on me. But this is a fitting occassion since tomorrow is a day to celebrate him and the gift I've been given with HIM. I have learned so much from my dad. Real life stuff. This is the man who has showed me how to perservere and rise above the circumstances in life. Polio left one arm pretty useless but he never lived a victim because of it. He made the best of each situation complex as it looked to everyone else. Time and time again you'll hear someone say "You're dad's the guy with the one arm? He works harder with one then most men with 2..." Just makes me proud of him. The man who exemplified excitement for the little things in life, AND had a way to make his daughters laugh hysterically at the things He'd try or say or explain. He showed how to love people, as Christ does, leading by example in the ways of looking for the good, trusting time and time again when others woulda said it was over the limit. He is also one of the most forgiving and trusting men I know. A dad who loves me and left a good healthy taste of how our Heavenly Father provides and loves us and thinks we are all special! He's also been a fabulous husband and has set the standard of how a husband should love His wife and has loved her well and you can tell He cherishes my mom like crazy. Dad, you've been the provider, willing to sacrifice thing stuff you would have liked for youself to make sure your girls were taken care of, I know it was a hard row to hoe sometimes BUT you did it well.

Thank you daddy for providing, for caring, for investing, and for training this child. I love you and respect you, and I miss you. There's a place in my heart that will always be yours. And I know I took for granted all the moments we had at home but thanks for releasing me to where God has called me, for always being that support and believing in me and letting me make mistakes, cheering me on when I succeed, just loving me through it all! You are my hero!

LAUGHTER AND PATIENCE

Tue, 08 Sep 2009 12:05:11 GMT

Such a grand evening last evening! Reminds me how much I appreciate laughter, not just out of politeness or forced but REAL, from the heart. Laughter is good like medicine and I'm thankful for the gift of genuine joy. Several of us got together to watch Psych-so it wasn't anything too intense or deep, but it was a perfect way to wind down a Labor day...even if we all went home at 9:30 :) It was just good to be able to share the lighter side of life with the same people that you can also see a serious, heart-felt, eternal perspective with. Good stuff right there.

Then as I was driving home the ever good and faithful Father spoke to my heart "Sharon, I know you want to know the end of the current journey, BUT if I'd take you there today you would miss out on all I want to do in and through you before then, so just keep being changed from the inside out." So hope and peace and strength and desire and excitement rise up from within and I just thank THE ONE who is the Author of it!

WHO AM I?

Fri, 04 Sep 2009 11:49:07 GMT

Over time youve healed so much in me, I am living proof.
That although my darkest hour had come,Your light could still shine through
Though tough at times its just enough to cast a shadow on the wall,
Well I am grateful that you shine a light on me at all

Who am i that you would love me so gently?
Who am i that you would recognize my name?
Lord who am I that you would speak to me so softly
Conversation with the love most high who am i

Amazing grace how sweet the sound that saved a wretch like me,
I once was lost but now Im found, was blind but now I see,
And the more I sing that sweet old song, the more I understand.
That I do not comprehend this love thats coming from your hand...

Musings, meditations, and many other thoughts

Wed, 26 Aug 2009 18:42:32 GMT

Many months later…I surface again. Since I’m only having lots of little thoughts and not sure how to connect them into one big nice happy family of connected thoughts it’s going to be a random post. Call it ADD or whatever you will. I realize that pictures would be more interesting BUT it’s so hard to live in the moment and capture it on camera at the same time. So it’s just words.

MOVE TO INDIANA - Some wide open doors just made it pretty obvious that God was bringing me back. The timing fell together and here I am, away from family and home, but confident that it was for my well-being that I returned J

YOUTH CAMP—Possibly the best thing of my summer. I helped in evening at one and full-time at the 2^nd one. Different on so many levels but different was better than good. I had 6 girls who captured my heart from the first hello! The week went superb, minus a few minor gliches in the system-I’ll spare gory details :) Days of just being able to connect with campers and have super fun activities, talks, fun hilarious moments and serious times. I was fully alive! The truth that I came away with that was so timely for where I have been for so long was that “God’s silence does not = God’s absence. Luke Kuepfer spoke and brought out the point of the Bamboo plant and how for years on the surface it doesn’t look like anything is happening then the 4^th?? year up shoots a tall glorious plant, only supported by the intense root system it was developing in the first years of silence. This camp brought my heart to life and I realized how much I LOVE being able to relate to teens and how much I love “relational ministry”…

WEDDINGS – After my all-time high year of wedding festivities I can say I’m ready for a lull in the action though. Between showers, preparations, rehearsals, and the actual wedding- my life has been filled with LOVEY DOVEYNESS from every angle J Something about weddings I get wrapped up and caught up in the moment. I’ll call myself a romantic realist. From personal attendant, to bridesmaid, to coordinator, to musician, to USHER! J I’ve loved/loving the different dynamics and viewpoints! As I see each one of my dear friends make this commitment and transition and see over and over again how when God writes a love story - He does it well and perfect. No doubt in my mind. Sigh…

MOMENTS MADE FOR WORSHIP- I’ve thought about that A LOT lately. Yes there are days when the sun is shining bright, I’m fulfilled, I’m healthy, feeling good and things couldn’t be better, and I can shout from the mountain top OH I LOVE YOU GOD…but then there are those moments of weariness, hurt, confusion, and sadness n bursting into tears at every little sight, sound, smell, touch, & taste. Those are also moments made for worship. Oh it’s a beautiful thing. Yes it is. What moments in your day are made for worshiping?

MY CHURCH- My current heartbeat and purpose. I love it. I have so much respect for the leadership there, and what God is doing in their lives it comes out in where they are leading us the people. I love the youth group, and the potential for great things that is there. I also am just excited about the church body as a whole! I’ve found ladies who are mentors, friends, encouragers and people that have relationships with the Lord that have been truth speakers into my life time and time again. It’s such a picture of what the TRUE church is supposed to be. I know I am here for such a time as this, and want to join in with what God’s doing in my church NOW. The burden has been placed in my heart for friendship evangelism in the local church, and oddly it seems that other ministries have grown strangely dim at the moment, which wasn’t where I dreamt I’d EVER be. Strange how it works. I wish everyone could find their place in a body of believers, just like God intends church relations to be like.

WORD PICTURE- As I was sitting in church last Sunday and then running through my mind this week is the picture of myself driving a car and I'm behind some slow, oversized vehicle in a no passing zone. My first instinct was to pass quickly and get on with life and get to the next place on the list. But hold it Sharon- I’m in a “No-passing zone” for a reason. I can see the hills, and curves but can’t see what's beyond that. My Father reminded me that HE sees the end of the route, and the reasons for no-passing at the moment. So I resolved to drive slowly behind what I think is the “slow vehicle” in my life.

ROAD TRIP TO OHIO- Took a VERY random, last minute, less then 24 hr road trip to Ohio this past weekend. EXACTLY what I needed, the trip out with Telle & Shaina and the time with Jewel was sooooooo of the Lord. Just so you can get a glimpse of the thrill of the road trip part...Just imagine a Silver car coasting at a “less then speed limit” speed, at 2 in the morning, to preserve the remaining drops of fuel until we could make it to the gas station and couple of us singing with confidence (in order to encourage the nervous driver of course) “I’m counting on, I’m counting on God…” {ok so u may have to know the song, or been there with us…}

ROSE COLORED GLASSES - Do your friends a favor and allow them to be human. Don’t hold them to a different standard then you hold yourself. Allow them to struggle. Recently I’ve addressed situations and comments were made that just made me sad and mad. I’ve done a lot of soul searching am I just not real enough with people? Do I not let them see the human side of me? I’ve found freedom when people can see my humanness and then can allow grace to let the friendship deepen.

FAITH -n- SURRENDER. I’ve been doing a lot of thinking of what that actually is. I say that God is all knowing and all-present, but when it comes to surrendering everything, I tend to question His existence by how I'm living it out. What’s the point in believing on someone, and yet not having faith on Him? When I say that God is there, why can’t I give Him a chance to bestow His love on me? Do I have enough faith that whatever He has given or taken has some eternal purpose? Surrendering to God does not mean that I should stop doing what is expected of me. Rather it means, that I should carry on, without getting perturbed by life’s ups and downs. Imagine how beautiful life could be when you are completely focused on the present task in hand, and when you know that you need not worry about anything else, as you have already surrendered everything to God.

SONG FOR EVERYTHING…Music is powerful. It’s been used to meet needs and minister to me on a daily basis…A song in the day and a song in the night. You know I’m not a song writer in the least because I stink at communicating my thoughts in logicalness, but I can totally identify w/ the ppl who write lyrics to a lot of songs. I’m glad I can benefit from their giftings. But I think I find couple songs daily that become my new favorite!

MY JOB…What a BLESSING. I could gush. Even though the actual work part was an adjustment and I missed the banking world at first, nothing compares to the contentment and how much I like it now. Not only that but I love the atmosphere, the flexibility, but I think the biggest gift is my boss-who has stepped up to bat as a 2^nd dad to this little floundering single gal away from her home. I would have never dreamt that I could have an employer who would not only be able to relate on a professional level, but he also takes time out of his day to ask about my personal life, and then above all speak LIFE and TRUTH as a man of God and guide with wisdom. God does give good gifts to his CHILDREN!

MISCOMMUNICATION-Why was that ever invented?

SUMMARY - So yeah the above thoughts are what’s been on my mind the past weeks. It’s been long time coming, but I've found a place of quiet rest near to the heart of God. If I get to much further away from that yeah well I'm not even going to go there. J

Thursday, February 12, 2009

Thu, 12 Feb 2009 23:12:42 GMT

THE CURRENT EQUATION

+ = March 2-6, 2009!!!

Saturday, August 30, 2008

Sat, 30 Aug 2008 02:25:18 GMT

I am very aware that i have neglected xanga in the last 6 months...so please try not to rub it in. BUT I'm here for the present and am presenting my 6 months in review...

Cor's wedding in CANADA...so special to be involved and had a WONDERFUL time reconnecting with 2 lovely ladies...both who I only see once a year MAX but the heart connection is still there. Always will be.

CAMP COUNSELOR IN INDIANA....5 special, lovely ladies. Only a week.

JEWEL...I miss you...But significant other I know you are smack dab in center of God's will. Such a great example of how to experience peace and contentment in life.

FAMILY REUNION...Where would I be without my family? I love you all!

SOUL FRIENDS FROM IOWA...GOD'S GIFT TO ME...MY CRUISING PARTNERS.. You've have helped me through/in the past 6 months. Good, bad, up, down, near, far---we can still get back together...

FLOODING...8 miles from home...out the back door of my former place of employment.

FREEDOM RALLYS...my heartbeated a little bit faster....My SARA DARLIN....yay for early morning breakfast...I love being in your presence!

CAMPING IN MY BACKYARD WIT AJ...I can depend on you to just BE. I love you

Only several pictures to represent the months. It doesnt do justice because I never have my camera at the right times.

Good times in past 6 months. Tough times in past 6 months. Searching times in past 6 months...but the above things/people have been there in the midst of it. Thank you friends. Thank you GOD...my ONLY HOPE.

Wednesday, February 20, 2008

Wed, 20 Feb 2008 12:54:33 GMT

PAIN the gift nobody longs for still it comes, and somehow leaves us stronger when it's gone away.
I pray for YOUR will to be done and I confess it's never fast enough for me.
It seems the hardest part is waiting on You Lord, when what I really want is just to see YOUR hand move.
I want a peace beyond all understanding, I want to feel it fall like rain in the middle of my hurting.
I want to feel YOUR arms as they surround me, and let me know that IT"S OK to be here in this place.
RESTING in the place that only comes, in the waiting! Time to just let go and JUST BELIEVE, trusting in what no one else but You can see. Freedom from the fears that close me in, when I can't get beyond where I have been. But then again the silence doesn't mean that I'm alone, as long as I can hear that I am STILL YOUR OWN.

I confess, the above are songs lyrics, not original with Sharon....I STAND AMAZED, and BOW IN ADORATION, I DANCE, then STAND IN AWE of what God has done, I SING HALLELUJAH one moment and CAN BARELY SPEAK AT ALL the next....to try and explain it would mean a way longer post and so ladies and gentlemen let me just let you in on a little secret I've found...keeping your eyes on yourself brings nothing but unfullfilled, heaviness and unsettled incompleteness but lifting your eyes to the maker of the moutains you can't climb, to the calmer of the raging storms OH MY WORD talk about indescribable good stuff pulsing through the veins! Good stuff defined as "hard things and easy things", but seeing a bigger picture of my Creator in it all. Because it doesn't make sense but all I know is I'm living FREER then I have in awhile...That doesn't remove pain but moves us to THE PERSON who allows me to feel pain the first place.

So chin up. Yes, both of them.

Oh what to say...

Sun, 03 Feb 2008 23:45:32 GMT

Being stuck inside on a snowy sunday afternoon with 6 amazing girlfriends is pure delight! I have been blessed with the most wonderful friends!

God is sooo good!! :):):)

(Thanks Nene for that wonderful insight.)

IT'S TIME, IT'S TIME, DID YOU JUST SAY ITS TIME?

Sat, 17 Nov 2007 18:52:06 GMT

No, it's not quite time to update yet...xanga's not quite on the top of my priority list right now . For more reasons then ONE!

There's a time and a place for everything saith Ecclesiastes...and right now is not the time.

IT'S A BOY.!.!.!.!.!

Tue, 04 Sep 2007 22:18:17 GMT

yeah, about them changes i was referring to...

ITS OFFICIAL...MAY I PRESENT TO YOU.......WENDELL STUTZMAN!!! I'M BLOWN AWAY FOLKS. THIS IS ONE OF THEM THINGS GODS BEEN WORKIN ON LONG BEFORE I KNEW WHAT WAS HAPPENIN...[well my roomates n couple others thought they were working on it too...] DO YA EVER FEEL THAT GOD HAS GIVEN YOU A GIFT AND IT JUST BLOWS YA OFF YOUR FEET??!?!? YEP. NOW I GET TO LOOK FORWARD TO DEVELOPING A FRIENDSHIP WITH SOMEONE WHO NOT ONLY HAS A HEART SOLD OUT FOR CHRIST BUT IS CRAZY FUN AND LOVES TO LAUGH AND YEAH, THE LIST GOES ON...:)

THE NEXT CHANGE THAT IS ABOUT FAR FROM THAT ABOVE MENTIONED ONE WOULD BE JUST MOVING BACK TO IOWA AS OF YESTERDAY...

SO BEAR WITH ME AS I WALK YOU THROUGH THE LAST MONTHS MEMORIES IN INDIANA...I KNOW MY PRIMARY MISSION IN INDIANA WAS TO SERVE AT GOSPEL ECHOES, AND I ENJOYED THAT TO THE ULTIMATE, LIVING COMPLETELY FULFILLED, BUT THERE ARE PEOPLE OUTSIDE OF THAT WHO HAVE MADE LASTING IMPRESSIONS ON MY HEART FOREVER...YOU MADE IT "HOME" AND HAVE BLESSED MY LIFE IN WAYS YOU PROBABLY NEVER DREAMT. I MISS YOU ALREADY...I HOPE THE FRIENDSHIPS WILL LAST FOR A LIFETIME.

CHUCK-E-CHEESES- One Sunday night we took a bunch of younguns out for the evening. My little boy just wasn't quite sure if he wanted to have a girl to hang out with but by the end of the night all was well...Audwin and couple of the little dudes model their sucker prizes...

SISTERS N FRIEND VISITORS - They were so faithful at coming to visit! Thanks for the support and yeah I'm ready to come home and be with you again..(aint that just a lovely jeep? )

JEFF'S VISIT - Fun times with Mitch and the Martin family at Taco Bell....Going to Essenhaus for supper to be waitressed by SaraJane...and then back to Martins for a great night of Scum, just like old times...

FAREWELL AT CHURCH - Life size scrabble, food, and crazy times...

FAREWELL AT SHAINA'S - blessed discussions all around

NIGHT AT GREG N MELS - S'mores, Sparkler bombs, Campfires, Fireball....

EVENING AT BORKHOLDERS - Well many things happened that night, a pic is worth 1,000 words :) but overall it was just quality time with my quality 2nd family...Thanks Borkholders :)

MY FAITHFUL HACIENDA LUNCH DATE - Erin G

LAST WEDNESDAY NIGHT LEADING WORSHIP - Complete with an amazing band, all dressed in black!!!

LIMO - Yeah this was probably my biggest suprise ever in my life...walking out the door to go out with a bunch of girls and what did my eyes behold, but a STRETCH HUMMER LIMO...provided by the gentlemen from church...talk about overwhelming. Yeah. Good guys. A night of icecream, Panera bread, and volleyball game visit.

FT WAYNE SOFTBALL TOURNEY - Biaggis for lunch with my Echoes sistas, at tourney most of day, DQ with a bunch of people :)

DREADFUL MOVING DAY - Lots of goodbyes, changes, sadness because of change, but that has been cushioned by Austin, Danae, & Jana who escorted me home. Thanks for letting me "cope" at random times on the trip home. I love being with you and not having to hold anything back.

Guess what I had in my devotions this morning? I think God was telling me how to respond to the sheer excitement and the heart breaking goodbyes and struggles the past week... Job 1:20-22 "At this Job...fell to the ground in worship and said,...The Lord gave and the Lord has taken away; may the name of the Lord be praised. In all this Job did not sin by charging God with wrong doing."